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Funny Quotes

W

Wildfowler

Guest
Gimpyguy put a link on a recent post to some very funny remarks made by W C Fields. Below are some remarks made by nobody famous but that i heard from fellow Officers whilst in the Royal Air Force.

Officers Mess, into the bar walks an American USAF Officer his chest bedecked with medal ribbons. RAF Officer (Navigator) at the bar heard to remark to his friend
"Don't look now but I think Magnetic North has just walked in "

Another Navigator Officer on finding he was posted to RAF Kinloss asked
"Thats in Scotland isn't it?"

RAF Instructor to a class of up and comming fighter pilots.
"On occasion you may find your Navigator will get airsick. If he is sick, he is going to feel bad about it so don't rub his face in it!"

Me settling into the rear seat of a Tornado for a first trip.
"Whats that large green button for?"
Pilot
"No idea, but don't press it will you old boy"
Later on a strange warbling noise is heard
Pilot
"What the hell's that, you've not pressed that bloody button have you?"

Very nervous young Air Cadet being strapped into the rear seat of a Chipmunk aircraft for his first flight
Pilot (A very experienced ex fast jet pilot) seeing the lad is nervous asks
"Have you flown before?"
Air Cadet
"No Sir, Have you?"

RAF Warrant Officer on watching an aircraft crash badly on landing
"Oh well. Shouldn't have joined if he couldn't take a joke"

On proudly telling my Uncle (Ex Regimental Sergeant Major) that I had been granted a Commission in the Royal Air Force as a Pilot Officer he said
"Congratulations Son, you are now offically Pond Life"

Deflate one ego :redf:
 
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