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Sad loss in my home!!!

Here are a couple suggestions about getting a new kitty. A youngster, not a kitten but perhaps a half grown adolescent, would look up to the older resident cat and that might help them get along better.

Another possibility would be to get two kittens, preferably litter mates. Two because one would drive the older cat crazy with its constant need for play. Two would play together and the older cat could join in if and when she wants to, and not be pestered o distraction when she wants some peace.

Another mature adult might work out. If you adopt from a rescue group that fosters cats in members' homes, they could help you select one that isn't at all alpha, so (s)he wouldn't challenge the established one for "top cat" status in the family.

Sometimes cats will avoid status issues if they're of different genders, but that's not always the case, and sometimes two of the same gender get along just fine.

I know that the cat(s) you adopt will be very well cared for and deeply loved. What a lucky kitty (or kitties) they will be!
 
Alex, sorry to hear about Big Berta. I was out of town, or believe me I would have replied sooner. If you've been on the forum long enough, you know how close I am to all of my cats, AND my dog Chief. Take comfort in remembering all the joy she brought you. I love my animals so very much. They are a gift from God.

NC
 
Thanks for the kind words and the advice (especially Mick).

The pain eases little by little by little... We have been thinking a lot of course and our conclusion is,
a) we - we do this for any pet-companion who lived with us - create an album. Look for every photograph, drawing, document and assembling a big picture-book. We can get it out when we feel to and remember our lost ones.
b) observing our other cat we are not (maybe just yet) going to get a new companion. The two cats have been very seperated in recent years and the left (strong alpha-behaviour) cat seems to cope allright with the extra amount of love and attention she gets now. Just as we ourselves she seems a bit sad at some moments, but we will get through this. The wish to get a another cat seemed more a selfish urge to ease our own pain fast than to look what the cat wants. But time will tell...

Thanks!
Alex
 
First: Alex, gecondoleerd met je verlies!

grunau_baby said:
..... The wish to get a another cat seemed more a selfish urge to ease our own pain fast than to look what the cat wants. But time will tell...

Thanks!
Alex
Click to expand...

Please turn that thought around: there are many many many stray cats in shelters that really need a family to live with. When spring comes, the shelters will be flooded with new litters of kittens..... You now have space available to rescue ONE, that is sitting alone in a cage AT THIS MOMENT!
 
Don´t get me wrong, please. I am the kind of person who goes into the shelters and can hardly get out off there without stuffing as many creatures under my arms as I could cary.

Both the dog and my cats are always safed from the shelters, but at the moment I have to think about my left cat first and the fact we (both wife and I) have little time next to our jobs. Giving a new animal a new home is a complicated matter for all involved and it needs time. Besides, my cat is very very dominant and it would for sure completely break my (and the Mrs.´) heart to have to put the just rescued cat back to the shelter if it would not work out! And this is at the moment and concerning our cat´s behaviour the most probable outcome.

Believe me, I will always get as many poor creatures out off these places as my finance, time and living space will allow me, but it has to be for the good of ALL involved. Moreover we feel we have to get over Bertha´s death first, before deciding this. Especially my wife emotionally inclines towards comparing too much with her loss, that would not do any new housemate justice. We need some time to heal first, witnessing this was way too severe...

Alex
 
Please Do what is Best for you..
I do realize the Pain of lossing a beloved pet..My Cat Katastrophe is 12 years old..There is a Day coming where she too will Pass away..
I dread to think of this..And I have Lost beloved pets..
Healing will take place..
Allow yourselfs to recover..
Then do what you think is best for you..
May God Bless you during these trying times..
 
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