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Throwing in the towel and getting a divorce!

O

OBIO

Retired SOH Admin
Tonight was the night that the final straw was strawed. My marriage is now beyond the point of no return. Tomorrow I will be calling a divorce attorney and ending this train wreck.

Why? Did Deb have an affair with someone better looking than me. NO...even though 93% of the US population is better looking than I am. Did Deb sell my most secret of secrets to some tabloid magazine. NO...my most secret of secrets aren't worth a hill of beans. Did Deb throw away my most comfortable pair of worn out boxer shorts...the ones with more holes than fabric and the 1/2 inch thick skid mark encrustation? It's far worser than that!

What she did is this:

While organizing the kitchen pantry, she took her half eaten bag of fat free, sodium free, flavor free, baked pine twig looking pretzel sticks and dumped them into...AND ON TOP OF...my half eaten bag of Andy Capp Hot Fries!

The unmitigated gall! The blazen disregard for human decency!

I know that once I tell my heart braking tell in court, there isn't a divorce judge in the country who will not side with me and grant me a full divorce...and award me both dogs, the 42 inch Plasma 1080p TV and the garage door opener.

OBIO
 
Are you serious? A divorce over a bag of junk food? My sis (she's single) sounds similiar to Deb, she can get a bit carried away sometimes!
 
Ha ha! That's a hoot. How could Deb treat you that way????

Throw the dog out, crash the car, max out the credit cards... but don't mix flavorless-fat-free snacks with man's food. The unmitigated gall!
 
Been divorced a couple of times over some of the same issues Tim...come to find out they all do it!!!! LOL the unmitigated gall of touching our manfood...
Ted
 
Wow,....dumping some 'save-a-calorie' dumb pretzels top of the man's Andy Capp Hot Fries? Yep,...sounds like a serious marital issue you've got on your hands Tim. However, I'm sure you'll be able to work this issue out before seeing a counselor. About the only thing that would be worse if Deb dumped the stuff on top of a giant bowl of fried Cheetoes,....not baked ones.
 
txnetcop said:
LMAO well it is cheaper than a divorce...and more palatable!:ernae:
Ted
Click to expand...

Alright guys, I've spotted! LMAO!

But you know what they say about why divorse is so expensive...

Because it's worth it! :icon_lol:

Running for cover in case my wife sees this!

Caz
 
whut the hecks an andy cap hot fry?............and about those encrusted undies...i was withsome one who had that everyday in real life and i did the laundry....most digusting thing i ever saw and she wanted me to do her panties by hand.....i just laughed and tossed em ( with a pair of tongs) into the washer.........found out from her daughter years later she had a colonoscopy at age 40.....
 
Daveroo said:
whut the hecks an andy cap hot fry?............and about those encrusted undies...i was withsome one who had that everyday in real life and i did the laundry....most digusting thing i ever saw and she wanted me to do her panties by hand.....i just laughed and tossed em ( with a pair of tongs) into the washer.........found out from her daughter years later she had a colonoscopy at age 40.....
Click to expand...
Shurly you jest,or have led a very sheltered life.Andy Caps hot fries,I grew up on them.The things people miss out on.
 
Cazzie said:
Alright guys, I've spotted! LMAO!

But you know what they say about why divorse is so expensive...

Because it's worth it! :icon_lol:

Running for cover in case my wife sees this!

Caz
Click to expand...


hey Cazzie you really believe you'll get away with it...I have your phone number for a fee I won't call her! LOL
 
Well, my wife better stay away from my hole infested, skid mark free (honest, but mostly due to detergent abuse), "don´t worry be happy" faces covered pair of boxers dating from mid 90´s which have survived 4 girfriends, one move over and currently my marriage...

Prowler
 
Mr. OBIO I am sorry !!!

Sorry to hear about the divorce things...............My Mom and Dad got divorced when I was four and a half...... I still miss them together...... But when they are together, I feel squished inside, Mom is not happy to see Dad, She is happy to see all her friends but the sight of Dad - I can hear her teeth grind sometimes :) I wish my Mom get to find a person that will not hurt her feelings. But I know she is happy this way. Mr. OBIO, maybe you can think it over before you get a divorce. My Dad regret to get one, but Mom said it way to late to change heart. I remember praying for Ms. Deb and you and for your fathers in law. I will pray for your decision and Ms. Deb too! All your children will be sad to see you too separate ways. I say children but i know you know what I mean little puppies.... and big dogs.
 
I had the pleasure to speak with OBIO on skype, the Divorce has be averted..:applause:
A new bag of hot fries has been delivered. and all is well in the world..:applause:

As long as the hot fries hold out there will be peace and happy Hot Fries munchies (Unspoiled by Girl Food) for the deprived....
And there was MUCH Rejoicing..:jump:
May peace and happy days bless those who now have "unspoiled" Hot fries... Forever..
 
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