I won't be watching the game....and not because there may or may not be an ad for a man seeking man dating site. I refuse to watch sports on TV..especially the Super Bowl. Why?
First, there is the PRE PRE PRE PRE Game show, followed by the PRE PRE PRE Game Show, then the PRE PRE Game Show and the all important Pre Game Show. Then there is the Post Pre Game Convention and Trade Show. Then comes the Coin Toss..but only after the Pre Coin Toss Show..which is now paired with the Post Coin Toss Show. Then the players take to the field...and it's time for a dozen commercials. Then comes the first play...and a penalty flag and another dozen commericals. Then the penalty is refuted and the refs run to the side line to review the play, while the players stand around slapping each other on the butt. Then the Post Butt Slap Show with Dick Buttkiss, or however you spell his last name. Then a commerical break with the announcer guy who reminds me of John Candy...but much less funny. Finally...after an hour and a half, the ball is put back into play and the QB throws the ball into the nose bleed section of the stadium...which then has to be analyzed by 15 retired football players and some anorexic chick with lips so pumped up with collegin that her mouth looks like a hemoriod donut...and we all know that she doesn't know a darn thing about foot ball, she's just there because she has spent some time in the boss's office after hours....wink wink.
About 12 hours after the whole mess started, we may eventually get to the half time show...which is postponed to make room for the Post 1st half of the Game show and the Pre Half Time Show Show.....then some inane blabber from some guy whose only exposure to a foot ball team was when he was the equipment manager at the third rate community college he flunked out of....yet, there he is in the locker room giving us a run down on what the coach said to the players and how the players responded to being told that since they were making more money in one year playing a game than the average worker will earn in 40 years, they really should pretend to be foot ball players and not just a bunch of overly paid, pampered, and pretty much useless to any real aspect of society numskulls.
Then we have the Pre Second Half Kick Off Show and BBQ Contest. Then the football gets kicked and we start the whole thing all over again.
Eventually, after close to 24 hours, a one hour game of football has been played and analyzed to death, some network has raked in a gazillion dollars for advertising, some talentless puke got to sing a few of his or her crappy songs while millions (billions?) of people stood in line to empty their beer stretched bladders.
Yeah...America at it finest!
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